Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Chamomile Motha' F****'!!!

Click here for a listen and a laugh.

I am waiting to post about the weekend until someone sends me pics.

Nothing else to declare.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

I spike the internet.

I just defended my thesis.

This weekend I'm playing in a Halloween tourney and it's going to take all my willpower to not spike the disc.

I pwn PCBs.

Monday, October 23, 2006

Chemistry majors are ugly nerds.

Friday night was spent relaxing at Ollie and Angela's. Colin already detailed this evening including pictures that are all digital and stuff so go check that out. He's more articulate than I am anyway.

Saturday I went down to Champaign for Jay's Oktoberfest BBQ. Jay's parties are always amusing but follow the same trends. Most everyone there are chemistry grad students and divide into defined cliques. I mingle amongst those I already know and get along with and meet a few of their friends. Then we retreat and spend most of our time conversing among those of us who are outsiders into this world of U of I chemistry.

I had a good time and got to see Ross and Tom so that's always a bonus, even though Tom turned in early because he wasn't feeling well. Jay and I went 3-0 in Cornhole and only lost because we decided to throw for style (Jay went between the legs all game, I did KA-J skyhooks). We still managed to score points doing this, Jay will be the first to let you know that he scored more than me.

Tom gets the joke of the night. I was telling a group what I had left to do for my thesis. I told them that I still had to get my appendices together. Tom says "I thought you got that taken out last year." I hate you Tom.

Most significant aspect of the night was obviously the Cards win. Second most is my apparent ability to flirt and get noticed. At some point during the game I got hungry so I went outside to see if food was still on the grill. Most everyone is inside so the only one outside I know is Jay's girlfriend Val(erie)(p.s. that joke is funnier than I will get credit for). Valerie is talking to a girl I didn't know. I had to wait a bit for food and I hadn't really said "Hi" to Valerie yet so I began talking to her and this girl she is with. The conversation continues and Valerie's food readies so she leaves. I keep talking to this girl because I am not a prick and was being polite. Honest. Regardless, my food finishes as it begins raining so I advise her to seek shelter and enjoy the night if I don't see her again. I get my food and head inside.

Upon entry, I get berated by everyone I know if I enjoyed my half hour of flirting with this bird. I ignore it mostly but it comes up several times again throughout the night. Do I really not talk to girls that often and it becomes a spectacle when I do? Do I flirt that much? Is it me just focusing on this because it's about me?

Fun epilogue to this tale of heroism, I never say another word to the girl for the rest of the night. She ends up getting all handsy with one of the guys who lives at the house and puking her guts out outside in the rain for a solid fifteen minutes. I journeyed with Jay, Ross, Phil (Chem major), and two embodiments of the opposite of my fantasies to Mary Anne's for a stack at 3 a.m. Stacks are disgusting.

Friday, October 20, 2006

Thees ees my thesis.

Per request from Martha, the following is a sample from my thesis. This is the first paragraph from my introduction so it's supposed to hook the reader and keep them from putting it down. I will post something real on Monday after a weekend break from writing and I actually submit the thing to committee. Enjoy.

Polychlorinated biphenyls (PCBs) are a class of synthesized compounds composed of two bonded phenyl rings with chlorine atoms located at any of the ten possible bonding carbons of the phenyl rings. Figure 1 shows the general structure of a PCB compound. From one to ten chlorine atoms may be present, at varying locations, resulting in a possible 209 different congeners. The congeners may be categorized by degree of chlorination (or homolog group), such as monosubstituted, disubstituted, and so forth. The highest degree of chlorination, the decasubstituted PCB, is properly named 2,2’,3,3’4,4’,5,5’,6,6’-decachlorobiphenyl. The use of proper names can be burdensome and more commonly PCBs are referenced using a naming system originally developed by Ballschmiter (Ballschmiter and Zell 1980). This naming system assigns a number to each PCB congener starting with the lowest degree of chlorination at the first possible substitution (2-chlorobiphenyl, PCB #1) up to the fully substituted PCB (PCB #209). Various numbering systems have been used since Ballschmiter’s originally proposed scheme, but most follow this order of naming and will differ in naming only a few select congeners (Table 1). Ballschmiter’s updated proposed numbering system (IUPAC) is used in this report.










Edit: I added the Figure to help clarify (maybe). It's my first picture on my blog. That is kind of depressing.

Friday, October 06, 2006

Stupid Survey

Still busy as hell working on the thesis. Expect sporadic posts until Oct 23rd when I hand the damn thing in.

In the meantime, I decided to post something a lot of you have read but I really like. This is a questionnaire sent to me by my brother's ex-girlfriend for some magazine article job she was trying to get (I don't really know or care). I got frustrated two questions in because I thought the questions were inane, in addition to grammatical and spelling mistakes. So I had fun. Hope you do too. My answers are bold.

1) Have you ever considered marrying someone, or been engaged? (How many times?)

Only to the sea, but she broke it off

2) How important is marriage to you (on a scale of 1-10, 10 being very important and 1 being you never want to get married).

8.3145

Explain your rating:

Its the Gas Constant in the Ideal Gas Equation PV=nRT

3) How important is having a relationship with a significant other to you? (on a scale of 1-10)

5

Explain your rating:

It’s the number of times I have had sex this year plus five

4) Do you consider dating a) an elimination process to find a person you would like to have a longterm relationship with b) a fun way to socialize c) as involved with the other gender as you with to get.

d) Wish is misspelled

5) How do you define "marriage" ?

By looking it up in the dictionary and then reading what it says

6) What is the point of marriage?

42

7) Do you consider marriage a positive thing or negative, and why?

Positive because it repels me

8) Are pre-nups a)absolutely necessary or do they b) illustrate a lack of faith and fidelity?

The real question is why a lack of faith is necessarily indicative of a lack of fidelity

9) Are your parents married/divorced?

They are both widowed

10) What do you like better 1) being in a relationship or 2) being single.

1, because you shouldve put "1) being single" for aesthetics

11) Do you see yourself getting married someday? In 5 years /10 years/ 15 years/ or more?

Yes, as soon as legislation is passed allowing man to marry monkey

12) If yes, will you 1) elope 2) be married in a church/temple/mosque 3) be married by a justice of the peace 4) be married somewhere else, outside of a religious institution but by a man of the cloth.

4) At Universal Studios when Jaws pops out of the water

13) Ideally, do you think marriage should be a pre-requisite to having children? Why?

No, it should be a post-requisite

14) What do you think is the main reason people get married? a) to have children/start families b) desperation c)it makes financial sense d) start a new live with shared dreams and goals e) societal norm/obligation?

None of those seem mutually exclusive

15) What is a "deal-breaker" for you in terms of relationships: a) religion b) class c) racial/cultural differences d) education e) location f) political leanings g) Other

c) if fat is a race

16) Order by significance from 1-10 (one being most important, 10 being least) what qualities are most important to you in a potential partner

1 Honesty

1 Respect

1 Shared interests

1 Shared political views

10 Shared religious beliefs

1 Education

1 Sense of humor

10 Open mindedness

1 Value-oriented (high moral standards)

1 The unexplainable "gut-feeling" or "CLICK" factor/chemistry

17) What do you bring to your relationships with people in terms of traits/characteristics:

Lack of a conscience

18) When is the last time you were in a relationship you considered "serious."

The restraining order was filed last July

19) Is the seriousness of a relationship determined by a) the amount of time invested or b) the intensity of emotion invested

a) because b precludes sex with robots

20) Do you think there is a correalation between the "problems" in society and broken homes? (violence, drugs, low test scores) Yes, no or maybe

Yes, faulty foundations are the source of all social problems

21) Age: 25

Sunday, October 01, 2006

What's new is what's new

I realize I didn't really update at all this week. The reason for this is that I am defending my thesis shortly (2-3 weeks) so that kind of takes priority. After this, I should have more time and be a lot less stressed.

A little update on the past weekend. The week passed without incident and I made it through alive so chalk one up for me.

Friday night I stayed in and watched Brick. That isn't entirely accurate as Cassie, Jay, and Colin forced me to walk three miles beforehand. I don't mind walking, but I had just sat down and opened a beer. Brick, for the record, is the best movie I have seen this year. Go see it and see if you can avoid the urge to drop into lingo. The peanuts were good but I still had to push.

Saturday was eventful. I had intended to stay in and work on my thesis but I got only a little work done and lost focus. I'm not sure why but I couldn't get on track and then it was time for the Cubs game. I hadn't been to a ballgame this year and Jay acquired free tickets on the up-and-up. Myself, Jay, Colin, and Nathan sat in Wrigley Field for just shy of five hours. A rain delay and fourteen innings of baseball takes time. The Cubs rallied from a 8-0 deficit to force the extra play but couldn't find a winning stroke in the additional lanes on the scoreboard. Still enjoyable overall.

While not our initial plan we left the stadium at perfect time to head straight to Leslie McScrapheap's housewarming party. A short pitstop to purchase spirits at the CVS nearest the stadium and we were on our way to the loving new home of said hostess and Ruthstess. A few things about the party:

-Cassie is a lightweight and kind of a cutesy drunk.
-KO and Ruthless are cementing their place as what is hot.
-Leslie and Ruth are wonderful hosts.
-Colin, as seems to be the norm, narrowly avoided fisticuffs with some ruffian. I suspect only the surroundings prevented a physical exchange.
-Chuck showed up with novelties in tow. If I ever attend a party with him again and he fails to do this I will be sorely disappointed.
-Lastly, and most important because it is about me, either everytime I speak to a girl I am flirting or my friends are just assuming I am. I was accused of devoting social time to the pursuits of Allison. I am not offended by this accusation per se, but I don't consider myself to be overly flirtatious except when intended. A brief version of this last point entirely is me shrugging and being all like "whatevah."

Sunday was spent watching football while lying on the couch. I wasn't hungover but I wasn't ready to go watch a parade or anything either. I did help Jay with schoolwork by participating in an interview partially concerning my blogging experience. The wonders of new things. Also had practice today again. My posts barely support. I'm swimming but the water's troubled.

Monday, September 25, 2006

Losing by losing. (Long post, feeling introspective, sorry)

This weekend went off better/worse than expected. That last statement was intended to require explanation and set up this post. Cue expository paragraph.

So going into this weekend my fears were that the frisbee team would implode and I would have to wade through all the conflict and laziness to salvage a decent frisbee weekend for myself. This was actually the least of my worries. Some problems existed but they hid themselves below the surface and I never felt like I was babysitting. This is a minor triumph for me at this point. This shall hereto be referred to as better.

This did not translate to production on the field. We went 0-6 on the weekend. I know we were the 8th seed of 8 teams and that we therefore played to seed, but that doesn't change the fact that we lost games that I know we not only could have won, but should have won. In two games we were up by a score of 12-8 only to end up losing 13-15 and then 12-15. Losing, I dub thee worse.

I can't help but feel responsible for this. I took the weight of this team on my shoulders when I decided to be the captain this fall. I feel that a better captain could've rallied his troops in the face of a surging enemy and fought back the charge when it came. Instead, we fell and I feel that my legacy and stature are much like that of Napolean. I didn't play as well as I could've, but that's actually not my point. I didn't make anyone else play better because of this, and that is how I have failed.

I couldn't help but reflect a bit on how this all made me feel while laying around being sore/doing nothing when I got back yesterday afternoon. I started thinking about my entire competitive career and I came to this realization: in every aspect of competition in which I have challenged others I have a losing record with only one exception. Limiting my discussion to athletic competition and starting chronologically:

Little League Baseball - a significantly low win percentage. This is highlighted by the fact that in my first year and last year of competitive play my team failed to record a single win.

High School Football - three wins over the course of two years of play (3-13). Even if I had continued to play all through high school my record would be approximately the same as the team did not improve dramatically, or at all actually, when I left. At least I can say it wasn't my fault.

Church Softball - a losing record despite the fact that this is probably the best I have ever played. I was deep in the order and played right center. There was little to no pressure on me and I thrived on it, hitting line shot singles up the gut or grounders directly down the lines for singles galore. We still managed a losing record for three consecutive years and then folded when a crisis in the church came about (don't ask).

City-League Softball - Wicked Awesome's chronicals are detailed more clearly in Taylor Street, but in summary, we won two games and I was absent for one.

Ultimate - this needs subsections

College Ultimate - the team I played on had been very good making nationals my freshman year. I did not play until my junior year and then I was injured. So I really only have two significant years of undergrad playing. These two years, we were definitely above .500 (officially I can really only remember my final year record of 17-10). Grad school record might be slightly above .500 were it not for this fall season.

City-League Ultimate - I can just logon to the Ultimate Chicago site and see that I am 30-32 in my career.

The one exception?

Youth League Soccer - third through fifth grade my team (The Sounders) were pretty good, finishing first for one year and second the other two. I then gave up soccer.

Does any of this matter? Is the value of a player defined by his team's record? I don't really think so but at the same time it's been sixteen years since I've been on a team that won a championship.

An additional note: I went to the last Don't Forget The Nuggets show ever on Saturday night and had a blast. These guys have a stage show is unbeatable and the music is catchy. Go to their myspace site and listen for yourselves.

Friday, September 22, 2006

Suicide as a lifestyle

I have been destroying my body lately.

I had frisbee practice on Wednesday and I went and played soccer with Oliver and Co. (teehee) All told it was about four hours of solid running. On top of that, I have been lazy in going shopping so I have been eating whatever food I have left, which isn't always the healthiest option.

I've also been severly stressed as of late. My thesis is always stressful but with the deadline approaching of course all readouts are nearing caution. It has also fallen upon my elegant shoulders to take charge of the frisbee team for fall, this of course bearing with it the resposibility to deal with personality conflicts, laziness, and apathy from undergrads. It will get better. Sectionals is this weekend and after that should be much more laid back.

Some goodness is happening. I-Bar continues to be a source of stability. Colin is suprisingly more entertaining with a girlfriend who isn't around, but with spies everywhere. Martin and Megan are actually okay and in London, not in fact locked in a Gulag somewhere. Megan gave me a shoutout in their blog surely doubling my readership to four. I got to see Lily eat bark this past week as well which is always a treasure.

I'm gonna go buy milk, eat a light dinner, and then pass out, not necessarily in that order. But probably in that order.

Monday, September 18, 2006

Horse Sense

I had an interview today to become an analyst at the Horse Racing Lab. I won't say how I thought it went because my perspective on these things is somewhat skewed.

I did want to take the time and just lay out my philosophy regarding interviews. I try to be as open as I can while maintaining some sense of professionalism. This refers to everything I do. Dress, talk, dance, etc. My thought is that I am a commodity and they should want to hire me. I shouldn't have to pretend to be someone else in order to get the job. Me will show up if they do hire me anyway, so why fake it in the interview?

That isn't to say that I am judgemental of those who play themselves up in interviews, or even resumes. It makes sense that you want to work and that you want to present the best characteristics, even if they aren't your own. It's just not for me.

Also ran a mile this morning. I need two things: a stopwatch and a bathroom scale. To steal a joke from Louis CK, I want to go buy these in a weird combination to freak out the people at Target. "Hi, I need a stopwatch, a bathroom scale, a bicycle pump, and some shampoo."

Sunday, September 17, 2006

What's the opposite of "emptier?" It's "filler." Not really, but that's kind of what this post will be.

Frisbee practice got lighteninged out today, leaving me with a little bit more free time and extra calories to burn. And also very few interesting stories.

A few random thoughts:
-I need to find a way to work "hoi polloi" into a post because it is fun to say.
-The Packers are not a very good football team.
-How I Met Your Mother is a fun show, but isn't really multi-layered.
-I need new cleats. I need to figure out how much I can spend on cleats.

I finished Marvel 1602 by Neil Gaiman. I enjoyed it but I can't help but wonder why so much of what is written now is reimagining existing characters. Would this story be as compelling if the characters were original? Maybe not. Why is there a lack of strong new characters in the major comic universes? Is there really or am I just not paying attention? These are questions that don't need answers but I suspect that my brother is the one who will answer them for me.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Family Movies

Don't know why this is on my mind, but it is, so nyah. Here are the top five movies of my family. This isn't a list of our individual favorites. It's a list of five movies that we watched together that we all enjoyed and anytime one is on, we'll call eveyone into the room or think about everyone who isn't with us at the time.

1) Stalag 17
Wonderful performances, highlighted by William Holden's Oscar winning performance. While I saw The Great Escape first, this movie really explained to me why POW's do the things they do.

2) Harvey
For anyone out there who doesn't understand why Jimmy Stewart is so beloved by my parent's generation, this movie explains it better than any words I type could. I'll end my argument with my favorite quote from this, or possibly any movie:
"Years ago my mother used to say to me, she'd say, "In this world, Elwood, you must be" - she always called me Elwood - "In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant." Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant."

3) The Gods Must Be Crazy
Why is this movie funny? I have no idea. I don't know how to explain the humor of this movie. It's hard to convey, but it crosses demographics since all members of my family laugh when this movie is on. Anytime I see an empty bottle on the street I think of hurling it off the end of the world.

4) The Magnificent Seven
Maybe my mother hates this movie. She might purposely be in the kitchen whenever it's on. Too bad the rest of us love it enough to make up for her even if she does hate it. Steve McQueen's nonsequitors throughout the movie are a special treat for us.

5) Fantasia
I have no idea why I distinctly remember being excited to go see this movie with my brother and my father. I don't know why my mother remembers so many parts of this movie. I don't really know. It snuck on this list, and seems appropriate.

Here Goes Something?

I decided to do this because Luke is a lazy shit and never updates the website. Plus, I have a lot of ideas that randomly pop up that seem like decent things to write about but not good enough for articles. Plus, everyone else has a blog or three and you don't question their motivations. Stop judging me.