German polar bears that won't murder you.

Unnecessary Book Review: The Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid

This was my first experience reading Bill Bryson. I had heard good things about him from my father, Colin, Cass, various dogs, etc. I must say I was not disappointed.

This story is the autobiography of Bill Bryson's childhood. It is interwoven with childhood fantasies but for the most part is a nonfiction retelling of life in the Midwest during the 50s and 60s. Bryson does a good job of describing the world without dwelling on detail. The reader is allowed to fill in small details with how they would picture this world to be and it makes for a powerful visual image.

Bryson's writing style is humorous and good-natured. There is very little animosity in his words and when it does appear it is almost always done for effect, be it a laugh or otherwise. He seems so earnest in his desire to chronicle what Des Moines was as opposed to self-glamorization, as if it were a cherished uncle sharing stories at a funeral to remind everyone how great things used to be.

What are some bad things about the book? You are such a negative Nancy sometimes, imaginary reader. Well, the book does jump around a lot between descriptions of childhood and descriptions of American life in general. This is done mostly to aid the reader's understanding of things. Only once did I find a general life description to be carrying on. Also, a bit of the humor and exposition is clearly aimed at an older audience (read: your parents) but I can appreciate this as the book was lent to me by my father.

The book is not deep. There are no secrets hiding behind the surface. The book is a story of a kid's life, not anything more. This is not a criticism of the book at all. It is not always necessary to use symbolism and weave a morality tale into a simple story (do you hear me M. Night Shamaylan?!!!).

Overall, the book was a simple joy. I imagine my father enjoyed the book more than I did. I hope to see him soon to talk to him about it and thank him. I look forward to sampling Bryson's fiction work in the future.

Favorite part: The licorice baby story. By far.

Unnecessary Movie Review: Muppet Treasure Island

Let me start by saying I love the Muppets. I will probably never stop loving Muppets. There is no reason not to love Muppets.

That being said, Muppet movies can be difficult to watch sometimes. You definitely have to be in the right mood to watch people interacting with socks and get enjoyment out of it.

This is by far the best of the Brian Henson Muppet features. It has a lot of great comedic moments in it and some outstanding (read "over the top") performances from Tim Curry and John Cleese. Gonzo is great here as usual. Oh, and there are pirates and monkeys and Muppets.

There is a lot of bad about this movie that you should keep in mind. As with all Muppet films (with the exception of the first) there are at least two song/dance numbers that are terrible. Miss Piggy sucks. The main actor who plays Jim Hawkins sucks. Rowlf has no lines in the movie.

Overall, this is a great Muppet film that starts very strong and keeps going for the first hour or so and then kind of tails off into comedic purgatory. I'd say add it to your list if you've never seen it but hold off on watching it until you are in a goofy mood.

Muppet List-o-Mania

Top Muppet Movies:
1. The Muppet Movie
2. Muppet Treasure Island
3. The Great Muppet Caper
4. Muppet Christmas Carol
5. Muppets Take Manhattan

Top 5 Muppets
1. The Great Gonzo
2. Rowlf
3. All of the Electric Mayhem
4. Statler & Waldorf
5. Sweet 'Ums

Top 5 Non-Muppet Creations of Jim Henson's Studio:
1. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
2. Jim Henson's Storyteller
3. Fraggle Rock
4. The Dark Crystal
5. Farscape

Rowlf and Fozzie (probably the 6th best Muppet)

It's hard out here for a gimp (a pun).

Cass's ankle is doing much better now and she played soccer last night. It was great to see her out there because when she has to sit around inside all day for a week and can't run around she gets stir crazy. She played well. We connected on a perfect cross for a goal. The assist was done with dedicated professionalism and the finish was done with a flair. Woooooo!!!!

I played in my first Spring League Ultimate games this past Saturday. It was fun but challenging. I signed up with Cass for the Simpsons (non-competitive/beginner) league. I was the best player on the field for either team both games (told to me by outside sources, not me bragging). It made things difficult because I could tell my team was relying on me to make a play most times. This results in a lot of running for me and pushing myself harder. It will make for an interesting season but I'm sure I'm capable because I'm awesome and have a great body (again, not me bragging, your mom told me that).

And now for no good reason, certainly not because anyone demanded it, are my top five albums released since I got to college.

1. Bloc Pary - Silent Alarm
2. The New Pornographers - The Electric Version
3. The Thermals - The Body, The Blood, The Machine
4. Motion City Soundtrack - I Am The Movie
5. Alkaline Trio - Crimson

That's in no particular order and off the top of my head. I'm sure if I spent some time pontificating and perusing my collection I might make some changes, but then again if I didn't think of it right away how great could it have been?

For fun:

Happy Easter Y'all

Quite the weekend coming up. I have:
-A soccer brunch
-Frisbee games
-A solo drive to my brother's
-Easter lunch at Grandma's
-Work to finish

I am not attending church for Easter this year. Jesus did die at some point though so I feel a little bad about this. I may paint some eggs.

Alanis Morissette makes me smile